"He does not give me a divorce, but it doesn’t want to live together"

We are five years together. In February, he left, but not to another woman, and from me. The last drop was a quarrel, during which I hit it with a glass and poured on it its contents. Our relationship has always been emotional. For several months he just did not want to see me. Then we began to periodically meet for sex. We are both bad without each other, but he cannot take the final decision for himself. He does not give me a divorce, but goes away from the relationship. Says it is afraid of me as a person. He feels pressure on my part. On my proposal to live together he can not say any yes nor no. It is satisfied with our periodic meetings without commitment. I do not suit such relationships, I have already been 30 years old, you need a family and a child. All attempts to talk end in many hours clarifying and pronouncing the situation. I want to be with this man, but I don’t know what you can do.

Hello! Try to listen to what your husband says. Apparently, something badly did not suit him in your relationship, since he did not want to even see you for several months. He is afraid of you, feels constant pressure. It is unlikely that all these claims are unfounded – try analyzing how you behave in a relationship. For example, together with my husband, remember a few quarrels and note for yourself how you reacted to them. You write what you want to be with this person. He also wants to be with you, I haven’t gone anywhere. But ask yourself if you can’t be that you have created unbearable conditions for him in your marriage, that you do not listen and do not compromise, considering only your opinion faithful?

He does not give me a divorce, but it doesn't want to live together.

You could try to come to compromise solutions with my husband, find ways to show your feelings in a different way. You have tried all the options for pressure, argument and decision making. That is, in fact, all male ways. Maybe it’s time to try to listen and hear a husband, together with him to look for a way out, and not demand to immediately make a decision? Maybe it’s time to try women’s ways? Your husband is likely to be happy to help you with this. You can’t make a husband make a decision by force, you can only create the conditions in which he would like to return and create a family.

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