What if your role is married – the role of mom and her husband – Son or Child?
Your request for "change in relationship system" for me is too global. Especially from physics I remember that the system any attempts to influence it meets resistance. And since you yourself are an element of this system, you can get into the conflict of your conscious desire to change and unconscious "unsubscribe" to disturb the integrity of the deployment.
Before changing your stable roles, maybe it makes sense to see how they support you in life, from which they insure, what joys bring you? And if after the conscious assigning all the advantages of what is now, you will still have a strong desire to change the system, then start doing it slowly? Small chambers?
Here are such, for example.
Full all the advantages of your today’s role "Mom". That you from this "Mamina Hill" better see, hear thinner? What additional opportunities, for example, control over the situation you get? You have the opportunity and the desire to ask your husband – as far as he feels like "Mom"? And how does he applies to this?
And then, when you gather a picture of your advantages, you can still make one step. Carefully look at your wishes to change something. What exactly? In what volume? And to fantasize, how such changes can be on the "bonuses" of your today’s "mother’s" status to reflect. Do you have more anxiety, for example? Or more some concerns for the integrity of your family?
Do all this better writing. Then it turns out. And while you write – structuring your emotions, sensations, thoughts. The system is best "systemically" to see.
And maybe after this work it will be easier for you to see or comprehend what exactly from the elements of your family system would like to move a little on what period of time. For example, turn off one of the elements of my husband’s care, which is most busy now and makes you feel "mom" to him for several weeks. And carefully watch yourself – how you feel now, and behind him – how he reacts&# 8230; And then – navigate the situation. Good luck to you!