"Who am I really?»" I "and self-relation. Self-development, restoration of deep integrity

Addiction, and equally and co-addiction – the disease at which it turns out to be affected by the most central part of the person, its kernel, and then psychological integrity becomes the same destroyed as physical. Chemical addiction equally destroys the body and the psyche. This is associated with the following reasons.

Cause №1

Partly the integrity of the personality is disturbed even before the immediate development of chemical dependence, that is, before alcoholism, drug addiction is formed (or another type of addiction). Just this factor and becomes one of the reasons for the development of the disease.

After all, the personality retains its integrity until its central kernel is affected, a person can cope with almost any stressful situations &# 8211; In order to regulate its condition, enough internal resources. Then there may be literally "miracles".

So, Victor Frankl in the book "Tell me the life" yes "describes its experience in the concentration camps of the fascist Germany, including in Auschwitz. It gives examples of how young and healthy prisoners "burned" in the days when they lost the inner faith, the integrity, what. Frankan calls the "meaning of life" (and this is directly related to the integrity of the person). And on the contrary – weak and patients lived to liberation, if the inner rod retained: then they transferred any physical adversity.

… and I am sure that the purpose of all of a person without exception is high, no matter how urgently or criminal in reality, he has exceived his life.

Akunin-chhakishvili. "Another way"

While the internal integrity is preserved, a person can carry the hardest distress (negative stress). If it is broken, then the slightest adversity take out of themselves, makes losing support. Then the need for a support arises in the backshadow – and "crutches" appear in the form of PAP (psychoactive substances).

Thus, whatever genetic predisposition, no matter how external stress, but addiction begins to develop only when the internal integrity of the individual is broken.

In turn, the internal integrity of the individual is disturbed as a result:

  • systematic "incorrect" education in a dysfunctional family – so-called "Development injuries". For example, a child was humiliated, rejected … This happens in childhood, and then the soil is created for the development of dependence in the future;
  • It may also be a consequence Injuries – some traumatic event, such as rape, attack, accident … This can happen at any age.

Reason # 2

Who am I really

Violation of the integrity of the identity core is aggravated as the disease progressing. There can be no so-called "safe use", not carrying consequences – the body and psyche collapsed in parallel.

Therefore, one of the tasks facing experts in working with addictive behavior becomes restoring the integrity of the individual. If the identity core again gains integrity, then there is no need to use.

Also important work with image. The image I as a psychological construct consists of two components:

  • From the idea of ​​yourself (about your body, traits of character, feelings, principles …);
  • and from self-effort (which I am good, bad …).

The representation of a dependent person is significantly distorted. His contact with my true I was lost (and even never installed). Therefore, he either does not know what he and that in general he wants; Either he has a so-called false self – it seems to him that he knows himself, and in fact his ideas about himself and about his desires do not correspond to reality. In the latter case, the progress, the goals achieved do not bring joy – after all, in fact, something was completely different.

An example can serve as some representatives of show business, who sought to make a career, and when they really became stars, for some reason they threw out of the windows or slowly killed themselves with drugs ..

As for self-relation, deep inside the dependent person sits the feeling of its "badness" and "unworthy". This non-exclusion generates an autoagression, which is poured, in particular, in the development of addiction. Any type of addiction – self-destruction, autodistrative pattern.

At the same time, the dislike for themselves is usually compensated by externally opposing manifestations – by self-examination, demonstrative narcissism … This is formed as defense against the internal defendant. In reality, the trouble of the dependent person is not that he Loves only yourself (as it may seem from the side) – the trouble of the dependent person is that he Don’t even love yourself.

Do not confuse egocentrism and love. Addict Egocentric – his attention is focused on himself, as if the world was spinning around him. At the same time, he has no love for himself, neither self-acceptance … Example: one of our former patient, addict, admitted that when he lay in the hospital and passed by the consultant room, he seemed to him that at this moment the staff talk about him , and scold ..

Therefore, it’s not always clear from the part &# 8211; self-esteem dependent person overestimated or understated. The secret is that it is overestimated, and understated at the same time – two extremes replace each other, and they are both manifestations of inadequate self-esteem.

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